Why your life goals suck.
How I flushed my life goals down the drain, without even knowing it.
Do you leave your goals for times when you feel inspired?
Like the gym?
Do you only go to the gym when you feel like it?
Do you only work on your relationship when you feel like it?
Do you only think about your life goals on January 1?
My approach to my work day was that if I was going to be creating genuine content, then the moments that I create that content must be genuine.
So, I would sit back and wait for those moments to come through me.
I would wait for my 1st of January.
The problem was that these moments didn’t work to a schedule.
These moments didn’t know what time, or what day it was. They didn’t care.
They came when they came.
They came when I felt it to come.
They only came on account of my feelings.
Here’s the thing.
People usually apply this method of thinking to their life goals.
To "be a better person".
To "care more".
To “put more of myself into my relationship".
You simply cannot put a schedule on something you are feeling on doing.
This is why your life goals suck.
This is why you’re sitting here, not as a better person. Not caring more or putting more of yourself into your relationships. You’re literally the same. Don’t kid yourself, kid.
Our life goals usually come based on that feeling. That moment of inspiration.
Which is but a moment.
This is literally what happened to my goals.
My goal to write every day.
My goal to create genuine content.
My goal to connect with people through this work.
My task didn’t have a deadline or timeframe. And that was “ok" with me.
I felt ok with not pushing myself on this because I trust that it would happen if I allow it to happen.
(Who told you that, Irene.)
After 4 months of this, I realise that I was ok with this because
it meant I didn’t have to do it.
It meant I didn’t have to bother applying myself to something.
It meant I could do whatever I wanted to or could do other "busy/urgent" things.
Here’s the kicker which you saw coming:
I didn’t get anything done.
I sat down a few times to write when I felt like it.
But I didn’t really get anything done.
Not at the rate that I wanted it done.
Not at the rate that made me proud of myself and that made me excited to continue my work.
You can apply this not just to writing. But to absolutely any goal you have.
A lack of time-based schedule was my subconscious excuse to not have to work.
Just as your lack of time-based goal setting is your excuse to not have to do it.
Hold up though, because this is the absolutely absurd part:
You actually want to achieve these things. You really do.
I actually want to do these things.
I actually want to achieve these goals.
But when it comes to putting in the work,
the little monkey in my brain says “eh, I’ll do it tomorrow".
This is the absolute absurd thing. It is disguised procrastination.
Have a read of this article on WaitButWhy.
It puts an incredibly understandable analogy to why you procrastinate and what is actually happening to you while you’re doing it. You’ll find it so much easier to manage after reading this.
Set the schedule.
Hold yourself accountable.
Do not have this goal, this dream, this achievement in mind if you are not willing to put in the work.
There will be work to be done.
And you will need to do it.
Prepare yourself to work for it.
You will need to discipline yourself and you will need to hold yourself accountable.
If you can’t do this, don’t dream.
It is ok to not have dreams. If you’re going to spend your time procrastinating, you may as well relieve yourself of the tension and guilt of not doing something else. If you’re ok with looking back and doing what you’re doing right now, that is ok!
Work for it or don’t.
By asking yourself these questions and writing down your answers, you might find yourself with greater life direction. More focus, or relief.
Have you achieved a life goal?
Do you have a goal that you’re working on now?
What are you doing to work at it?
Now honestly, what’re you actually doing to work at it?
Imagine what it would feel like if you didn’t have to achieve your goal.
How do you feel?
Does the thought of letting your dreams go disappoint you or relieve you?
Let's talk a little more! Feel free to send me a message.